After being with the same person for over three years, it was painfully difficult to carry on with my life after we went our separate ways a little over a month ago. Everything I did no longer included my other half as usual… it made my world feel so unfamiliar. I know that everyone copes with these kinds of things differently. Many people pick up a new habit, such as painting or cooking. Others may just lay in bed and cry until the pain feels weak. And some of us, such as myself, find ways to live their lives through others in order to forget about their own by reading blogs. Looking back over the last month, I think of all of the people I have learned from. I see all of the images of adorable room decorations and DIY projects. I have lists of new recipes to try. I am planning where my next vacation will take me. These blogs have done wonders for me and I wish I could personally thank some if not all of their authors for giving me something to think about that was so far disconnected from my current life siutation. But at the end of the day, there is one more thing that stares me in the face and reminds me ever so firmly of my other coping mechanism: my bank account.
Let’s not lie, spending money can feel like a magical healing aid at times. Swiping my credit card has been feeling dangerously good these past few weeks, and the effect it has had on my checking account is becoming… large. But who is to deny a heart-broken girl from going out and doing what makes her feel better at a time like this? The shopping bags are beginning to pile up, but I can easily blame that on a much needed wardrobe. As I just started a new job, I need some more professional clothes of course. And those new Vera Wang heels obviously fit into that category… when I am trying to look professional on the weekends, which totally counts. And let’s not forget that now I live in a city that is significantly colder than my last home, so I am left with no choice but to buy some new jackets.
And scarves.
And boots.
And that awesome new bra from Victoria’s Secret.
But that’s not the point. The point is, I have been doing what makes me feel all good and warm inside. Just because I bought those night gowns because they reminded me of Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl does not mean I didn’t need some new sleepwear. And despite the negative effect it has had on my Bank of America checking account (and my credit card… shh), I can fall asleep smiling as images of my new items dance through my head. I know I need to slow down the swiping in the near future, but for now I will indulge to my heart’s content. The End. :)
